Not a loser

To the Journal editor:

T.J. Mudge suggests working mothers are at fault for their children turning to big city gangs for moral support and direction.

I suggest deadbeat dads who avoid their responsibility for parenting the children they produce are the true culprits.

Mudge suggests that because of women’s unique physical attributes, mothers are obligated to stay at home full time. I say that regardless of physical attributes and who works outside the house, both parents are obligated to nuture, educate and discipline the children they produce.

Children do not become the “losers” just because mom is working outside the house. Both my mother and father worked full time. I was cared for, loved, and in my opinion, am not a “loser.”

My wife has a college education and chose to be a stay at home mother because she enjoys it. I am pleased that my daughter is getting post-highschool education and training so that she will be able to work in a field that interests her, and will be able to independently support herself financially, whether she becomes married with children or not.

There are many good reasons for mothers to work outside the home. Deadbeat, incapacitated and dead husbands force mothers into working outside the home. A husband may be most interested in being the house spouse. The husband’s income alone may not be enough to support the family.

Another reason is that physical attributes alone do not make the mother. Not all individuals, man or woman, have what it takes mentally to stay at home full time to raise children. Some, me included, would go bonkers if forced to be in this situation. Not all children are little angels. Speaking from experience, my sister and I argued and fought plenty and I know we drove our parents nuts at times.

Given the options available today for safe, nuturing and educational child day care, there is nothing wrong with a mother stepping out of the house and working a second job. Personally, I’d rather have a happy and fulfilled working mother than a depressed mother who feels trapped in a lifestyle she despises.

“Winning” children come from families of both stay-at home moms and working moms. In the event of financial disaster, a working mom may be in a better position for supporting her family financially as the primary “bread winner” if and when the need arises.

Bryan Hill

Skandia